-Thank U Lord-

Last nite i went to bed not really feeling very happy but at the same time, i was feeling much better than i had a few hours b4 bed time. A call frm a friend was a way of God's manifestation of HIS love for me and that He cares for me! I was amazed!! And then, i was online...chatting with another friend. Haha....i was pleased to hear that he was pleased to be able to talk to a "human" as he puts it. But, i tot i will be disturbing....anyway, it was all these small small things that make me feel that God cares.

Anyway, i donno whether i said this before...but, last nite i really didnt feel like talking to God...i really didnt feel like even consulting Him...i didnt even feel like telling Him how i was feeling. Normally, i will!!! I will cry to HIM - knowing that no one understands me more than He does!! So, i reli kept everything to myself....angry with everything possible!!

I slept...

woke up this morning...bathed and went for QT. Somehow, i felt a bit more happy....

So...we were doing Acts 26...i was amazed at Paul....we all know how steadfast a christian he was...how HIS focus was on God and how he felt happy whenever he was given the opportunity to speak of Christ!! i was amazed at how Paul's love for Christ!!!

In the midst of doing my QT, i heard a very loud song of "Hallelujah to the Lamb"...ahh, a msg. I wonder frm who...phone was left in the room...well, i will not go get the phone or bother to look at the msg except that the ringtone is so super long that if i dont bother to answer it, it will probably bother a lot of ppl!...so, i got up...went to the room and got the phone. Went and see who msged me...it was mom! She wrote : "Hie Lee! How are u? My dream tells me that u're not doing too good. Trust in the Lord and we'll pray for u. Love u."

My heart melted!

Why??

It was right at that moment, i felt God whisper to me : Even if u think that no one loves you, I do! Very much in fact!!!

And......yes, God's grace i felt!! God's love i felt!!!

Last nite, i probably hurt God a lot by what i have said....the thoughts that have crossed my mind...the things that i was doing to myself. And right at that moment, the Lord probably gave my mom that dream. I was amazed. I was touched. I donno what the Lord did.....i donno why He did that....but i know He loves me!!!

Rite at that moment when i think that no one cares and no one loves me, God sends this long signal of how i felt to my mom....Amazing rite?

I asked my mom later what was in the dream...she said she saw me crying in Singapore. she felt the pain....she felt the sadness.....WOW!!!

Amazing......

I'm speechless....but to say, thank u LORD!! Thank u!!! and I'm SO SO SORRY!!!!