Awed

Having received unmeasurable amount of grace, I am thankful to God for all that He is and He has done for me. God has been good to me.

When Bernard asked us (ex-co members) to attend a meeting to listen to the International Director of the Navigators, Mr. Mike Treener, I was at a high! Yes, I want to go and hear from a godly man and learn. Came today, I was tired and was feeling rather lazy. How sometimes, the spirit is willing but the flesh is weak. I attended it anyway.

And the rest of my time in the Nav HQ was extremely encouraging. Seeing a man like Mike was very humbling to me and a great reminder too. When I see men and women of God being put in positions that grant them the label “saints” or “godly people” or “holy people”, I often picture a man with a tie, probably a tux, heads up high in confidence, speaks eloquently. (If a woman, dresses very well, likewise, heads up high in confidence, speaks eloquently…) But Mike didn’t have that appearance. A tall man, he walked in with a hunch, no tie, no tux, just a shirt and a pair of slack, and quiet. He spoke in such gentleness that I was so drawn to it. And as He spoke and shared of the passion in His heart, the heartbeat on God’s heart, I was so moved. He didn’t had to have “model essays” to get my attention. He got my attention when he showed that he loved God and all he wanted to do is to love God and serve Him. How can people not be drawn by such aroma of Christ in Mike? Of course it’s pretty impossible.

Mike “taught” us how to be a disciple, living and discipling among the lost. But what I took home with me was a very valuable lesson – probably something I shamefully confess, as something I need to learn and relearn – the lesson of: faithfulness. Not about God being faithful but about me being faithful. God is forever faithful and I cannot change that. But I am least faithful and I can and NEED to change that.

I had a very encouraging chat over lunch with Yin Wah. She and I shared how we can pray for one another and as she asked me how she can pray for me, I struggle to find an answer. Not because there’s nothing to pray for me but I think there’s too many. I was on a struggle to pick one. Then, I shared how it is a struggle for me to be faithful in ministry when there’s so much school work. I hate to divide but in the aspect of discipleship, it has been trying; in the aspect of evangelism, doors and hearts of people are opening up and that means more work. And sometimes I feel that school work is really burdensome. Leave me alone and I can do what I love best: ministry. But, let’s not get to there. And it is amazing because God has been answering my prayers. One by one, my friends are opening up. I wait patiently for one day when all my friends whom I’ve been praying for come to know the Lord. They come up to me, each one, opening up their lives before me and I know God is not only answering my prayer He is also giving me the privilege of being the one planting at least one seed. God is giving me the privilege to have my name jotted down for my friends’ life. Oh how I am unworthy. And I struggle because when I see the work that needs to do, I cannot cope because stress level goes up high and I don’t deal with stress very well. I need prayers. I need to be faithful. I need to be initiative. I need to love with the heart that Jesus loves. But, I thank God because Yin Wah really encouraged me by telling me how much she thinks that God has given me this “gift” where people feel comfortable to open up to me. And I really appreciate her affirming me this – coming from a godly woman herself. Amazing.

xxx

There’s nothing to shout about of Vivo City. Trust me. And it is the supposedly new biggest shopping mall in Singapore. I think Suntec is still bigger though. Design is creative but strange. I guess, art can be strange sometimes. Creative but not wise. The aisle is far too narrow and the gap between is far too wide.

xxx

I want Mark Schultz’s “Song Cinema” album.

Go watch Petronas’ advertisements for Deepavali and Hari Raya. The former a funny one while the latter a touching one. And yes, the touching one moved me to tears. I enjoy Petronas’ advertisements. Not many people can come up with advertisements like theirs.

Do I need to say more? I love Malaysia (and Malaysia’s products?)